Every morning, I take the renegade van into work instead of taking NJ Transit. The reason for this is three-fold. One, I was once hit by a NJ Transit bus, so screw them, am I right? Two, it costs two dollars with a ticket instead of an unreasonable 4 dollars. And third and most importantly, I am HELPING the economy by providing income to something other than the monopoly that is NJ Transit. Ok, it's mostly the saving 2 dollars thing, but still. I'm a patriot if you think about it.
There is actually a method to these renegade vans. I'm not just hopping on a random piece of public transportation hoping to get where I'm going. I know better than that. (I could end up on this random Peanuts-decor rape van I saw over the weekend. ) Now I am aware there's a language barrier between the driver and I most of the time but I follow the rules, people. Not always my strong suit.
Actual rape van spotted on Manhattan street
All the vans cost 2.50 without a ticket, but if they go to Gate 51 you can buy a ticket for 2 dollars. That dollar a day it saves me is totally helping me save up to buy this. Most of the vans that don't go to Gate 51 will still accept your ticket as they're always desperate to fill up with passengers. Being the responsible consumer that I am, I always ask the drivers before getting on the van. And they ALWAYS say yes.
And then you arrive in Manhattan where the drivers turn into said thieves and liars. This morning (not for the first time, may I add), I hand the driver my discount ticket only to have him inform me that he does not accept tickets and I need to hand over 2.50. Hell no, dude. We already had this discussion. It's practically like an iron-clad written contract. I'm not getting swindled out of 50 cents. You don't get to just corner me and humiliate me in front of the other passengers. I'm not easily embarrassed and plus, who carries cash anymore, anyway?
So instead of starting my day peacefully, it inevitably turns into warfare and I'm not backing down. He threatens to take me all the way back to New Jersey and I tell him to go right ahead. If he does that, he's only wasting space that could be taken up with another passenger he can hoodwink out of their 50 cents. Go right ahead, dude. I don't even want to go to work anyway.
Ultimately, I win the battle but I'm still losing the war. I'm up my 50 cents until this evening's humiliation rolls around. It's only a matter of time before every NJ resident regards me as the miser.