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9.05.2007

grievance: clubs

Clubs. Explain the allure here.

I went to a going-away party tonight for a gentleman with whom I went to high school... so naturally, after some time, I felt the need to leave.

"Why?"... one might ask. Because my friends wanted to go Stereo (whatever the fuck that is) and pretend to be cool inside a room with no windows, where you have two options: to sit around and scream over Sean Kingston (or whoever the fuck... Shauna mentioned him today to me, so he must be the new hotness when it comes to hip-hop and whatever it is the kids are listening to these days) or to try to get fucked by some random person who's already at aforementioned fenentre-less room.

I was considering going to stupid Stereo, after being promised free drinks, provided my buddy agreed to kick any dude's ass who touched my even remotely inappropriately, to which he agreed, really only because it was a friend's last night in New York... but I STILL could not bring myself to do it. We were at a rooftop bar/restaurant, with moderate, yet lively, volume and we were leaving to... wait, why were we leaving? I have no freakin' idea. The kid who was leaving New York didn't even want to go.

I used to go to clubs. When I was 16 and thought I was THE SHIT for being able to get into places people wanted to be in. But I'm sorry... I can't subscribe to the ideology of going to a place because it's hard to get into... I don't think it's cool in any way. But apparently PEOPLE do.

Maybe it's 'cause I don't like to dance.

But "dancing" apparently means getting drunk and jumping on velour couches screaming "oh my god, I love you so much!!!" while you try to get fucked by the next douchebag over wearing a pink polo shirt with his fuckin' collar popped and your mess of a friend ends up with a cocaine-induced bloody nose. Ok then.

Am I crazy for not understanding this phenomenon? I just want to TALK to my friends... is that a ludicrous request?


-moon

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